Why Self-Confidence Matters

It often seems that confidence is elusive, like a smoky mirage. Sometimes, it feels magical and wonderful; other times it can be frustrating.

But I’ll let you in on a little secret: you can build up your self-confidence without having to resort to any crystal. ‘How?’ you ask.

It’s simple.

Start by recognizing that confidence is a skill you can learn. You set a goal and take small steps each day to work towards it.

Keep reading to find out more about self-confidence and why it matters.

What Is Self-Confidence?

Self-confidence isn’t tangible. You can’t touch it and say, “This is confidence.”

It’s something we get a feeling for when we, or others, have it.

Likewise, we can recognize when someone lacks it. Even when they try to attempt to compensate for it, we sense it and feel bad for them.

The good news is that self-confidence is a soft skill, which means you can learn it and apply it to your daily life. It’s not fixed, like your height for example. It’s mainly based on your mindset and the actions you do to follow through.

You can boost your confidence and self-esteem by trusting your abilities. Seeing yourself succeed in your mind is the first step in making better decisions. Then, when your decisions make your life better, your confidence gets a nice little boost. And round and round it goes.

Bear in mind that confidence is infectious. Even though we can’t see it, we still sense other people’s confidence levels in the way they behave and speak.

When someone is confident, they exude excitement and energy. You’re motivated to work hard and feel that same energy.

The downside is it goes both ways. When one person lacks confidence, it can deflate everyone around them. They just get the sense that there’s no point in trying.

Why Does Self-Confidence Matter?

There are different reasons why being confident can improve your life. Below, you’ll find a few examples of how it can make you a happier, more fulfilled individual.

Allows You to Take Positive Risks

We all need confidence to bring balance and a sense of direction in our lives. Making a conscious decision to develop your confidence will allow you to take positive risks. It gets you out of your comfort zone and puts you on the path to success.

The trick is understanding your own strength. You have to believe that you can master whatever skill you’re striving towards. Yes, it’ll be weird and difficult in the beginning. Yes, you’ll make mistakes along the way. So what?

That’s what life is about. This is what boosts your self-esteem and makes you better at everything you do.

Empowers You to Embrace Your Failures

We all make mistakes. We all fail and meet obstacles in our lives.

The key is to understand that failures are a necessary part of progress. Read that again and really take it in.

Often, we feel that when we fail, it’s the end of the journey. But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

To fully embrace your failures, you have to think of them as detours. When you’re forced to change lanes or take a detour that doesn’t mean the entire journey is over. It just means you’re taking a different path, but you’ll get there eventually.

Now, why do some people succeed after failing and others don’t? Those who manage to learn from their mistakes. They go over what went wrong and find a way to fix it.

In other words, they use their failures to their advantage. They use them to prop them up and give them the push they need to keep going on their path.

Let’s take a second to think about Thomas Edison and Michael Jordan. What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of these two names? Success? Fame? Glory? All of the above?

How about failure? You’re probably saying to yourself, ‘These are two of the most prominent members of society. They haven’t failed.’

Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but they have—many times, in fact. Yet, they’re smart enough to use their failures as stepping stones to aim higher and work harder. Imagine our much our lives would have been impacted if these two men had given up every time they failed!

One of Edison’s quotes about refining the light bulb is, “I haven’t failed. I’ve found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

Enables You To Trust Yourself

Many times, we can be our own worst enemies. We critique every move, every word, and every thought over and over again.

In moderation, it can be a great incentive to do better. Although, this only works if we treat ourselves with the same kindness and empathy, we show others. Sadly, it doesn’t happen very often.

The best way to break out of that negative self-talk is to have faith in yourself. Have faith in your decisions. Even if you made mistakes in the past, that doesn’t necessitate future failures.

Own up to your bad decision, embrace it, and move on. That’s now part of your DNA; it’s helping shape a stronger, more resilient person.

Imagine it being part of your arsenal or a superpower. Now, you’ve turned your mistake into something that can make you more resilient and less anxious.

A Final Note

Self-confidence is an integral part of who you are. Understanding why it matters can mean the difference being happy and being miserable.

Having that self-assurance can help boost your relationships and career. You’ll also be able to inspire others to become happier, more fulfilled individuals.

Why Self-Confidence Matters

It often seems that confidence is elusive, like a smoky mirage. Sometimes, it feels magical and wonderful; other times it can be frustrating.

But I’ll let you in on a little secret: you can build up your self-confidence without having to resort to any crystal. ‘How?’ you ask.

It’s simple.

Start by recognizing that confidence is a skill you can learn. You set a goal and take small steps each day to work towards it.

Keep reading to find out more about self-confidence and why it matters.

What Is Self-Confidence?

Self-confidence isn’t tangible. You can’t touch it and say, “This is confidence.”

It’s something we get a feeling for when we, or others, have it.

Likewise, we can recognize when someone lacks it. Even when they try to attempt to compensate for it, we sense it and feel bad for them.

The good news is that self-confidence is a soft skill, which means you can learn it and apply it to your daily life. It’s not fixed, like your height for example. It’s mainly based on your mindset and the actions you do to follow through.

You can boost your confidence and self-esteem by trusting your abilities. Seeing yourself succeed in your mind is the first step in making better decisions. Then, when your decisions make your life better, your confidence gets a nice little boost. And round and round it goes.

Bear in mind that confidence is infectious. Even though we can’t see it, we still sense other people’s confidence levels in the way they behave and speak.

When someone is confident, they exude excitement and energy. You’re motivated to work hard and feel that same energy.

The downside is it goes both ways. When one person lacks confidence, it can deflate everyone around them. They just get the sense that there’s no point in trying.

Why Does Self-Confidence Matter?

There are different reasons why being confident can improve your life. Below, you’ll find a few examples of how it can make you a happier, more fulfilled individual.

Allows You to Take Positive Risks

We all need confidence to bring balance and a sense of direction in our lives. Making a conscious decision to develop your confidence will allow you to take positive risks. It gets you out of your comfort zone and puts you on the path to success.

The trick is understanding your own strength. You have to believe that you can master whatever skill you’re striving towards. Yes, it’ll be weird and difficult in the beginning. Yes, you’ll make mistakes along the way. So what?

That’s what life is about. This is what boosts your self-esteem and makes you better at everything you do.

Empowers You to Embrace Your Failures

We all make mistakes. We all fail and meet obstacles in our lives.

The key is to understand that failures are a necessary part of progress. Read that again and really take it in.

Often, we feel that when we fail, it’s the end of the journey. But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

To fully embrace your failures, you have to think of them as detours. When you’re forced to change lanes or take a detour that doesn’t mean the entire journey is over. It just means you’re taking a different path, but you’ll get there eventually.

Now, why do some people succeed after failing and others don’t? Those who manage to learn from their mistakes. They go over what went wrong and find a way to fix it.

In other words, they use their failures to their advantage. They use them to prop them up and give them the push they need to keep going on their path.

Let’s take a second to think about Thomas Edison and Michael Jordan. What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of these two names? Success? Fame? Glory? All of the above?

How about failure? You’re probably saying to yourself, ‘These are two of the most prominent members of society. They haven’t failed.’

Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but they have—many times, in fact. Yet, they’re smart enough to use their failures as stepping stones to aim higher and work harder. Imagine our much our lives would have been impacted if these two men had given up every time they failed!

One of Edison’s quotes about refining the light bulb is, “I haven’t failed. I’ve found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

Enables You To Trust Yourself

Many times, we can be our own worst enemies. We critique every move, every word, and every thought over and over again.

In moderation, it can be a great incentive to do better. Although, this only works if we treat ourselves with the same kindness and empathy, we show others. Sadly, it doesn’t happen very often.

The best way to break out of that negative self-talk is to have faith in yourself. Have faith in your decisions. Even if you made mistakes in the past, that doesn’t necessitate future failures.

Own up to your bad decision, embrace it, and move on. That’s now part of your DNA; it’s helping shape a stronger, more resilient person.

Imagine it being part of your arsenal or a superpower. Now, you’ve turned your mistake into something that can make you more resilient and less anxious.

A Final Note

Self-confidence is an integral part of who you are. Understanding why it matters can mean the difference being happy and being miserable.

Having that self-assurance can help boost your relationships and career. You’ll also be able to inspire others to become happier, more fulfilled individuals.

Self-Defense is very dangerous and takes on so much responsibility. Once you have crossed over the line of self-defense because you have no other choice, you can cause long term damage. This illustration shows you the primary targets to attack and to cause injury and major pain for the quickest reaction to stop the attack fast.

Remember get some training on how to attack these targets effectively.

From 2010

Flip The Switch For Success.
Some of you may or may not know that my wife owned a commercial cleaning service for years before she got sick and had to give it up. I did keep one account because of the ROI (Return On Investment) and the investment was my time. The account is a big church that is near my home and I can knock it out in no time and the account pays very well, all good reasons to keep it. Last Saturday night my wife was having a good day and wanted to go with me and help with the church. We left out about 7:15 pm and pulled into the church driveway around 7:20 pm.

The sun had gone down and it was a misty and cool fall night. As I pulled into the driveway I noticed a car slowly driving around the church and then it drives away. As usual I drive around the building and pull up on the right side of the building and under a big shelter that is attached to the building. I park where the entrance to the building is on my wife’s side of the vehicle. She gets out and unlocks the building door. The door is a big steel door with reinforced glass in the top half of the door and it has an automatic lock on it as soon as you shut the door. She was standing inside the building holding the door open a bit waiting on me. “I’m normally the one waiting.” I’m getting my cell phone out of the seat as I hear a car driving up behind me. The car is the same car we saw before and it goes around the side of me then pulls in front of me at a right angle. Now I’m pinned in on three sides and my wife is about 10 feet away on the
other side of the vehicle.

This is a situation that I don’t like. Flip The Switch. Because of my training I quickly assessed the “what ifs” and prepared my mind to take action. The “what ifs” are all the scenarios that could possibly happen. I did this for fun when I was younger, but now I’ve made it a habit. I feel like “Jason Bourne” at times. I make a game of it with my wife at times when we’re out to dinner or shopping. As this car pulled up and around in front of me I was standing on the driver’s side of my vehicle with the door opened. I noticed the car was a mid-size and it was black. The windows had some tint, but the way the street lights hit them I could see the silhouettes of 4 people.

They had also parked in the shadows of the building so I couldn’t get a quick look at any of them before they exited the car. I looked over at my wife and she knew that I didn’t like this situation and she also knew that if these guys attacked me to pull the door closed (self locking) and call 911. Let them think you’re strong when you’re weak and at times weak when you’re strong. Two guys jumped from the car very fast and walked my way. I reached inside the car and picked up my cell phone and just kept my hand inside the car as if I had something I didn’t want them
to see, like a hand gun. “If they thought I had a hand gun…fine.” As I completely stood up and held my hand inside the car, they stopped in their tracks. They were just at the front of my vehicle. One guy was a bit taller than 6 ft. at about 198 lbs. dark hair with a long leather coat. The second guy that jumped out was about 5 ft. 7 in. with a dew
rag and reddish hair. I knew right away these guys were not there for choir practice.

I was already looking for targets that I could strike that would do the most damage in the quickest amount of time. We train to target eyes, throat and groin as primary targets. I already knew the direction I wanted to lead them so I would have the advantage. I was looking for the most successful route that I could go if I had to engage. As I stood there face to face with both guys I looked the big guy directly in the eyes. We didn’t say anything for the longest time. I said; How you doing? They stood and looked at me some more for a few seconds, almost like they were trying to find some words to speak. The big guy started to ask some questions about the church and when would the Pastor be in and some questions that seemed like rambling. I told him I couldn’t help him and they stood there for a few seconds without saying a word, it felt like minutes. They turned and got back in their car without taking their eyes off me and I never moved, still with my arm inside the car. They drove off at the speed of a snail. I stayed in that position until they pulled out onto the highway.

The whole event lasted about 2 minutes. That may not seem like much time, but I’ve fought in the ring with 2 minute rounds that seem to go on for an hour. Your life can change within a flash. A flash of violence can be life altering or life ending. This scene could have had a very bad ending. My wife in times past would go to that building by herself. What if she was alone that night? What if I had been away from my vehicle? What does this have to do with being successful or personal development?

I thought you’d never ask!
1 – When you need to be successful in any situation, you must train yourself to take action!
Most people will never take the kind of action I’m talking about. If your life depended on it you
would “flip the switch” and go for it. If you plan to start a business, call sales leads or just work on your career you will need to “flip the switch” and get moving.
I teach street self-defense and it looks and is violent at times. I tell women in my class “you
must have the ability to flip that switch and commit to doing as much harm as you can as quick
as you can.” Do not leave it to chance. Just as in business you have to commit and never leave
success to chance.
2- Always learn and practice what you learn. In successful martial arts you have to fight and
spar to test your skills. In business you have to test your skills and learn from your failures.
When you know what you can do and what your strengths are you are better prepared to act
on your plan of success.
3- Learn to make successful judgment calls through practice. In the martial arts we need to
practice over and over to get our distance and timing down. We learn to make the correct
judgment and that saves us from getting hit.
A successful business must also practice through assessment and judgment to determine the
success of that business.
4- Study, Practice, Assess Then “Flip That Switch” For Success!
To Your Success!
Lynn Lane