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Pitfalls Of Instant Gratification, Being Impulsive

In a world where speed and convenience have become the norm, it’s no wonder that instant gratification and impulsivity are increasingly common. Whether it’s the lure of quick fixes, the desire for immediate pleasure, or the need for instant results, the pitfalls of these behaviors can be significant. In this blog post, we’ll explore the dangers of instant gratification and impulsivity and offer strategies for finding a healthier balance.

Instant Gratification: The Quick High That Often Leads to Long-Term Lows

Instant gratification refers to the desire for immediate pleasure or satisfaction, often at the expense of long-term goals and well-being. It can manifest in various ways, from indulging in unhealthy foods to compulsive online shopping, and even impulsive decision-making. Here are some of the pitfalls of instant gratification:

  1. Impaired Decision-Making: The rush of endorphins from instantly satisfying a desire can cloud judgment, leading to impulsive choices that may not be in your best interest. It can be a recipe for poor financial decisions, unhealthy relationships, or hasty career moves.
  2. Short-Term Gains, Long-Term Pain: Prioritizing short-term pleasure can have long-term consequences. For instance, neglecting your health by consistently opting for sugary, processed foods can lead to chronic health problems down the line.
  3. Depletion of Resources: Quick fixes can deplete your financial resources. Regularly indulging in instant gratification can lead to overspending, debt, and financial stress.
  4. Difficulty in Delayed Gratification: Constantly seeking instant pleasure can erode your ability to delay gratification. This skill is essential for achieving long-term goals, as it involves making sacrifices today for a better tomorrow.

Impulsivity: The Rush to Action Without Thought

Impulsivity is closely related to instant gratification but focuses on the tendency to act on impulse without thinking through the consequences. It often stems from a desire for quick results and can lead to a range of problems:

  1. Regret and Guilt: Impulsive decisions can lead to feelings of regret and guilt. You might find yourself questioning why you made a hasty choice when you knew better.
  2. Relationship Strain: Impulsivity can strain personal relationships. Saying something without thinking, making snap judgments, or acting impulsively in emotional situations can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts.
  3. Missed Opportunities: Acting on impulse can cause you to miss out on valuable opportunities because you didn’t take the time to weigh the pros and cons or make a well-informed decision.
  4. Increased Stress and Anxiety: The consequences of impulsive actions often result in increased stress and anxiety. It’s challenging to find peace of mind when you’re constantly dealing with the fallout of hasty decisions.

Finding a Healthier Balance

Recognizing the pitfalls of instant gratification and impulsivity is the first step toward a healthier, more intentional way of living. Here are some strategies to help you strike a balance:

  1. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness involves staying present and aware of your thoughts and emotions. It can help you pause before acting on impulse and make more thoughtful choices.
  2. Set Goals and Prioritize: Establish clear, long-term goals and prioritize them over short-term pleasures. Having a vision for the future can help you make better decisions.
  3. Create Accountability: Share your goals and intentions with a trusted friend or family member who can help keep you on track and provide support when temptation strikes.
  4. Develop Delayed Gratification: Practice delaying gratification by occasionally choosing the harder, but more rewarding, path. Small successes in this area can build your ability to resist instant gratification.
  5. Seek Professional Help: If impulsive behavior is a constant struggle, consider seeking help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in impulsive behaviors and self-control.

In conclusion, the pitfalls of instant gratification and impulsivity are real and can affect various aspects of your life. However, with self-awareness, mindfulness, and deliberate effort, you can find a healthier balance that allows you to enjoy life’s pleasures without sacrificing your long-term well-being and goals.

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Mistakes, Forgiveness, and Grace: Learning to Forgive Yourself

Mistakes are an inevitable part of the human experience. We all make errors, misjudgments, and poor choices at some point in our lives. However, it is how we respond to these mistakes, and the process of forgiveness and grace, that truly defines our character and personal growth. Learning to forgive ourselves is often a more challenging endeavor than forgiving others, but it is an essential step towards personal healing and growth.

Forgiveness, in its most profound sense, is not just an external act but an internal transformation. It involves letting go of anger, resentment, and self-condemnation, and replacing them with understanding, compassion, and self-love. To understand the process of forgiving oneself, one must first recognize the power of mistakes and the role they play in shaping our lives.

Mistakes are the stepping stones of progress. They offer valuable opportunities for growth, self-reflection, and personal development. Without mistakes, we would never learn, evolve, or become better versions of ourselves. Every error we make is a lesson waiting to be learned, a chance to refine our understanding and choices. However, in the midst of making mistakes, it can be easy to forget this and instead focus on the guilt, shame, and regret that often accompanies them.

Forgiveness is a powerful tool for breaking free from the emotional chains of guilt and shame. It allows us to release the negative emotions tied to our past mistakes and move forward. When we forgive ourselves, we grant ourselves permission to heal and grow. We recognize that, as humans, we are fallible and that making mistakes is part of our shared human experience. This understanding opens the door to personal transformation and self-compassion.

Forgiving oneself is a process, not an event. It requires introspection, self-awareness, and time. Here are some steps to help you navigate the path to self-forgiveness:

  1. Acknowledge the Mistake: The first step in forgiving yourself is to honestly acknowledge the mistake you made. This is an essential part of taking responsibility for your actions and their consequences. Avoiding or denying your mistakes will only prolong the process of forgiveness.
  2. Understand the Lesson: Reflect on what led to the mistake and what you can learn from it. Mistakes often provide valuable insights into our behaviors, values, and desires. Embrace these lessons as opportunities for personal growth.
  3. Accept Your Humanity: Remind yourself that you are human, and humans are inherently imperfect. Mistakes are a natural part of the human experience. Accepting this fact can ease the burden of self-blame and shame.
  4. Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same compassion and kindness that you would offer a friend who made a mistake. Practice self-compassion by speaking to yourself in a gentle and understanding manner.
  5. Make Amends: If possible, make amends for your mistake. Apologize to those you may have hurt or take actions to rectify the situation. Taking responsibility and making amends can help in the process of forgiveness.
  6. Release Negative Emotions: Let go of negative emotions such as guilt and shame. These emotions can be self-destructive and hinder personal growth. Understand that you are not defined by your past mistakes; you are defined by how you choose to respond to them.
  7. Embrace Grace: Grace is the divine or spiritual aspect of forgiveness. It involves recognizing that you are worthy of forgiveness and love, despite your imperfections. Embracing grace means forgiving yourself as a whole person, not just for specific actions.
  8. Practice Self-Care: Engage in self-care activities that promote emotional well-being. This may include meditation, therapy, exercise, or spending time with loved ones who support your journey to self-forgiveness.
  9. Set New Intentions: After forgiving yourself, set new intentions for your life. Use the lessons from your mistakes to guide your future choices and actions. This forward-looking approach can be a source of motivation and growth.
  10. Patience and Persistence: Self-forgiveness is not always immediate. It may take time, and you may encounter setbacks along the way. Be patient with yourself and persist in your efforts to let go of the past.

In the process of forgiving yourself, it is important to remember that you are not that person anymore. You have grown, evolved, and learned from your mistakes. The person who made those errors is not the same as the person you have become through self-awareness and personal growth.

Forgiving oneself is not a one-time event; it is an ongoing practice. It requires nurturing a sense of self-worth and self-acceptance. By forgiving yourself, you open the door to a brighter, more compassionate, and empowered future. It is a journey that leads to a more profound understanding of your humanity and the grace that is inherent in the act of forgiving.

“Empowering Self-Defense: Overcoming Physical Limitations After 40,50,60”

Introduction: As we journey through life, age brings with it a wealth of experience and wisdom. However, it can also present physical challenges that might make the idea of self-defense seem daunting, especially for those over the age of 40. But don’t be mistaken – self-defense is not solely about brute force and agility. It’s about leveraging your strengths, adapting techniques, and cultivating a mindset that empowers you to protect yourself effectively. In this blog post, we’ll explore how people over 40 can embrace self-defense while acknowledging and working around their physical limitations.

  1. Embrace Your Strengths: Self-defense is not a one-size-fits-all concept. Instead of focusing on what you can’t do, focus on what you can do exceptionally well. Age brings a deeper understanding of your body and its capabilities. Leverage your life experiences and wisdom to your advantage – it’s your unique strengths that will form the core of your self-defense strategy.
  2. Prioritize Mobility and Flexibility: While you may not move as swiftly as you used to, prioritizing mobility and flexibility can significantly enhance your self-defense capabilities. Regular stretching routines and exercises designed to improve joint mobility can aid in maintaining range of motion, allowing you to adapt more effectively during a confrontation.
  3. Learn Practical Techniques: Self-defense techniques should be tailored to your individual abilities. Enroll in classes that offer techniques suited for people with varying levels of physical fitness. These classes often emphasize leverage, balance, and technique over brute force, making them accessible to individuals of all ages.
  4. Master Situational Awareness: One of the most powerful tools in self-defense is situational awareness. Being alert and attuned to your surroundings can help you avoid potentially dangerous situations altogether. This awareness buys you time to assess and respond appropriately, regardless of your physical limitations.
  5. Focus on Effective Strikes: Rather than relying solely on complicated techniques, focus on mastering a few effective strikes. Simple yet powerful strikes to vulnerable areas such as the eyes, nose, throat, and groin can provide an effective means of defense.
  6. Practice Mental Preparedness: Physical strength is only one aspect of self-defense – mental preparedness is equally vital. Cultivate a strong mindset, empowering yourself with confidence and the knowledge that you are capable of protecting yourself, regardless of age.

Conclusion: Age is not a barrier to self-defense; it’s an opportunity to harness your unique strengths and adapt techniques to suit your physical limitations. Empower yourself with knowledge, confidence, and a well-rounded approach to self-defense that takes into account your life experiences. By embracing your strengths and cultivating a proactive mindset, you can effectively defend yourself and live life to the fullest, regardless of age.

Remember, the goal of self-defense is not to engage in physical altercations, but to ensure your safety and well-being. Consult with professionals who specialize in self-defense for people with physical limitations to create a personalized plan that works best for you.

Understanding Self Defense.

Self-defense is an important skill to have in today’s world. It is the ability to protect oneself from harm, whether it be physical or emotional. Understanding the different types of self-defense and the legal considerations that come with them is crucial for anyone looking to improve their personal safety.

First, let’s define self-defense. Self-defense is the act of protecting oneself or others from harm. This can include physical harm, such as being attacked by an aggressor, as well as emotional harm, such as verbal abuse or harassment. The goal of self-defense is to neutralize the threat and escape to safety.

There are several different types of self-defense, each with its own set of techniques and strategies. Some of the most popular types include:

  • Physical self-defense: This type of self-defense focuses on using physical techniques, such as strikes, kicks, and ground defense, to neutralize an attacker.
  • Verbal self-defense: This type of self-defense uses verbal communication to deescalate a situation and avoid physical confrontation.
  • Psychological self-defense: This type of self-defense focuses on using mental and emotional strategies, such as assertiveness and confidence, to protect oneself from harm.
  • Situational awareness: This type of self-defense is about being aware of one’s surroundings and recognizing potential threats, in order to avoid dangerous situations altogether.

When it comes to legal considerations, it is important to note that the laws regarding self-defense can vary from state to state. Generally, self-defense is considered justifiable when an individual reasonably believes that the use of force is necessary to protect themselves or others from imminent harm. However, it’s important to note that the use of excessive force or deadly force is not considered to be self-defense and could result in criminal charges. It’s always a good idea to consult with legal professionals or law enforcement for clarification on the laws in your state or country.

In conclusion, self-defense is an important skill that can help you protect yourself and others from harm. By understanding the different types of self-defense and the legal considerations that come with them, you can take steps to improve your personal safety and well-being. Remember, self-defense is not just about physical techniques, but also about mental and emotional preparation, and the ability to be aware of one’s surroundings and potential dangers. Remember that self-defense is a very important and often overlooked skill, but it’s not the only solution.

Personal Protection

Personal protection is an essential aspect of ensuring our safety and well-being. It is important to take proactive steps to protect ourselves and our loved ones from potential harm. This can include taking self-defense classes, carrying pepper spray or a personal alarm, and staying aware of our surroundings at all times. Additionally, it is important to have a plan in place in case of emergency and to know how to access help quickly. Technology can also play a role in personal protection, such as the use of GPS tracking apps or emergency response systems. Overall, personal protection is about being prepared and taking action to keep ourselves and our loved ones safe. It’s important to remember that prevention is key, and it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

6 Greatest Fighters

6 greatest fighters – It is difficult to definitively say who the “greatest fighters of all time” are, as this can be highly subjective and will depend on the criteria used to define “greatness.” Here are six fighters who have achieved significant success and are often considered among the greatest in their respective fields:

  1. Muhammad Ali: Widely regarded as one of the greatest boxers of all time, Ali was known for his quick footwork and hand speed, as well as his ability to “float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” He won 56 of his 61 professional fights, including 37 by knockout.
  2. Bruce Lee: Lee is considered one of the most influential martial artists of all time and is credited with helping to popularize martial arts in the West. He was known for his impressive physical speed and strength, as well as his innovative techniques and philosophies.
  3. Mike Tyson: Tyson was a dominant force in the world of boxing in the 1980s and 1990s, and is known for his aggressive style and powerful punches. He became the youngest heavyweight champion in history at the age of 20.
  4. Anderson Silva: Silva is a former mixed martial artist and is considered one of the greatest fighters in the history of the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC). He holds the record for the longest winning streak in the UFC and is known for his impressive striking ability and athleticism.
  5. Floyd Mayweather Jr.: Mayweather is a retired professional boxer who is widely considered one of the greatest fighters of all time. He is known for his defensive skills and undefeated record, with 50 wins and zero losses.
  6. Georges St-Pierre: St-Pierre is a retired mixed martial artist and former UFC Welterweight Champion. He is known for his well-rounded skills and dominant wrestling ability, and is considered one of the greatest fighters in the history of the sport.

Believe In The Possibilities!

The other day I was reading a very interesting article concerning a shark attack that occurred way back in 1916. It played off along the North East coast of the U.S. and concerned a great white shark that had been terrorizing the New Jersey beaches.

Now everybody knows and accepts that a shark is a creature of the sea and needs salty water to survive. Therefore nobody thought that a shark may attack them in freshwater, but that is exactly what happened later that year.

This particular shark remained close to the shore and eventually swam up a river stream around Raritan Bay, attacking a couple of bathers upstream.

Shortly before the attacks occurred, a retired Sea captain, by the name of Thomas Cottrell saw this shark swimming upstream while crossing a bridge. He couldn’t believe his eyes, but nevertheless got into his boat and raised the alarm. Not surprisingly nobody believed him. “A shark in a river? C’mon, get real, It’s not possible.”

But you know what? As incredible as it seemed there was a shark in the river and all those who didn’t heed the warnings were in danger of being attacked.

Eventually this shark killed two people. The first victim was a teenager who may or may not have heard Cottrell’s warning. Shortly after this attack another man jumped in the water to look for the victim, even though he was told there is a shark in the water. He too was attacked and died from a severe loss of blood.

While reading this I couldn’t help thinking about September 11 and see the parallels between these two stories.

When asked by the U.S. Congress and the media, why “clues” which should have been picked up were disregarded, the heads of the FBI and CIA as well as members of the Bush administration replied, “We didn’t think they would use airplanes as missiles.”

Had the FBI and CIA believed that something like what happened on 9/11 was possible they might have put measures into place which would likely have prevented this from happening. But they didn’t, even though the hijackers left dozens of “clues.”

Similarly if the swimmers at the US East Coast had believed Captain Cottrell when he told them there was a shark in the river, chances are that nobody would have been killed by this shark on that day.

But because they believed it is “impossible” for a shark to be found in freshwater they disregarded the warning altogether, just as the US law enforcement agencies did, resulting in many paying with their lives.

On the other hand there are human beings who overcame extraordinary odds and accomplished great feats. Every day we hear stories of people who were told by the so-called “experts” they didn’t have what it took, yet made it regardless.

The lesson here is that anything is possible, both the good and the bad. By believing or not believing in something doesn’t mean you will not be affected by whatever happens. But it means that based on what you believe, you may take some action which may save you from something terrible or may get you out of a terrible situation.

There are many of us who are in terrible situations, including poverty, unhappiness, debt, etc. Those of us who have changed their situation, did it because they believed they could make it.

Those who don’t obviously don’t believe that they can change their situation otherwise they would have done something about it, right?

How many opportunities have you missed just because you thought it wouldn’t work or wasn’t possible. Just think what you could do if you believed that you could do anything, even realize your dreams?

What great talent do you have which you have done nothing about, because you probably believed you can’t do it.

I hope to have shown you through this short article that anything is possible. And that by just believing, “I Can,” your battle is already half-won.

Preparing For Life

Preparing for life’s work out!

As I pulled into the gym parking lot this morning I noticed a young dude running in place and stretching. He continued to do this while I was gathering my gear to go inside. We both went into the gym and I stowed my gear and jumped on the treadmill to get a 25 -30 minute warm-up and some cardio.

As I started to walk I looked up at the big windows in front of me and noticed the reflection of a guy behind me…..it was the same dude I noticed in the parking lot earlier.  He was still warming up! He paced back and forth waving his arms, rolling his neck back and forth. Then he went over and got a smoothie and started to drink that while he continued his warm ups.

He looked as if he dreaded the real work out so much he was happy to just spend time preparing to work out. He prepared for his work out during the full 25 minutes I was on the treadmill and was still working on that smoothie as I left for work.

Preparing For Life!

Isn’t this a great metaphor for life? Look around at the people that wait for the right time to make a move in life. They say…when the kids are out of school I’m going to, when the economy is better I will, when I get the right information I plan to…….and the list goes on.

Most people are just afraid of the risk they may have to take. It’s the risk of looking bad or the risk of failing in the process.

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.” ~ Helen Keller

Life is about living and living is about risk. Remember how the world looked to us as kids? We had that feeling of wonder and amazement, ready to learn and be fascinated at every turn of the imagination. What happened? We got older and the world got more and more boring to most of us as we go through the same steps day after day.

I have one thing I’ve learned that I think is the most important for your success in life. This one thing will help you if you’re in the office or on the street. You can use this in any area of your everyday life. What is it? It’s the ability to take action! In the martial arts you can have the best skills and be in the best physical shape, but if you don’t take action it means nothing. If you’re in the ring to fight or on the street to defend yourself you must take action or be hit.

Ed Parker, the Father of American Kenpo Karate once said, “He who hesitates, meditates in a horizontal position.” You must move!

The same is true in your personal life too. Most people talk a good game about all the dreams and plans they intend but never go into action. These are the very people that will point out your failures and mistakes. They never worry about failure because they never attempt to do much in life.

 “A life without action is a life without purpose.”  You don’t need all the answers to get started!

Don’t let life pass you by while you’re preparing to live! Start today….start now!

Practice Mindfulness For Focus

Practice Mindfulness

Using mindfulness to build focus is probably one of the best techniques. The key step involved is to sit in a quiet place and take a deep breathe in. After that, you are required to hold your breath for a few seconds and then exhale. It is during this pause that you need to bring your mind back to the thing that it needs to be on.

Your mind tends to drift away every once in a while because the lifespan of human concentration is merely 8 seconds. It is due to this reason that you need to make this exercise a habit so that you can benefit from it. It also serves as a reliever of stress and can rid the body of any negative energy. Once you harbour positive energy in the body and you shift your brain’s function to one task, your focus will automatically improve.

Since we are all creatures of habit, integrating the right habits into your workday will help immensely. Once something becomes a habit, it also becomes easy. If focusing becomes a habit, it will come to you naturally and will let you have multiple benefits on a daily basis.

4 Ways To Improve Your Resilience

How To Be Your Own Superhero

Ask anyone that has seen movies with a “superhero,” and you will tend to collectively hear that superheroes are tough and resilient to all things that are bad. They take on many villains in their travels and still come out winning.

We may even wish that we had their strength, especially mentally. The reality is resilience is already in you. Though we find it easier to access as children, we often forget that inner strength just needs to be dusted off.

Learning to be resilient can serve to make you stronger; with any difficulty you face, you can gain new abilities and new ways of coping with life. Knowing that you are resilient will help you grow the courage to live your life to the fullest without fear.

 Flexibility and adaptability come together with durability. The more possibilities you envisage, particularly in challenging times and difficulties, the more you encourage yourself to transcend and grow as an individual.

  • Accept change – Would we really be internally happy if things never changed? That what we learn in our childhood would always be there. While there have been times of sorrow and satisfaction, each of those “stories” have made us who we are as adults.

In many cases, we can conquer what is trying to hinder us or to thwart us by one way or another. It would not be any different if we were to believe that we have the potential to be strong and that these challenges would be faced with resolve and trust.

  • Not giving in to stressful thoughts – Not only can we think about bad feelings that make us worried and nervous, but we dread the negative outcome. Natural human reaction is “fight or flight” in any given scenario where the outcome is uncertain.

“What if I mess up?” “What if they do not like me?” What if. It is necessary for us to take chances to grow. By growing your resilience to negative mindfulness, the more hopeful your days become.

Medium.com reported that, “Positive thinkers make the best out of most situations, focusing on what they can control, letting go what they cannot, and search for ways to improve the situation and lessons to learn.”

  • Promise yourself daily goals be met – Set realistic goals that you can reach daily, perhaps things that you can quickly achieve in the short term. This may look like organizing your closet or as simple as calling a friend.

By constantly putting off projects and tasks, the mind finds it ever harder to finally catch up, sometimes leading to depression or anxiety. If alarms are necessary, set them. If visual cues work better, try writing down your daily tasks on Post-It notes.

Place them near places you know you will see, such as besides the front door. As the Chinese proverb has written, “I hear and I forget; I see, and I remember.”

  • Start today – This applies almost as much to the expectations you give yourself as to taking decisive steps to deal with problems that you wish were not there. Dealing with challenges and concerns head on helps you know that you are in charge and in control of perhaps the most difficult situation, regardless of the outcome.

By taking steps, you know that you will do anything to alleviate the problem. Being wiser allows you to achieve even the smallest task, and ultimately, each of these minor tasks adds up to accomplishing a much greater outcome.

Final Words

Take care of yourself. If you are tired, nervous, or anxious, the propensity to ignore yourself may easily be the case. In the opposite, it is important that you strive to take the best care of yourself and your own well-being. Care for your body and mind.

Remember they keep you strong and more able to deal with tough times and difficulties.

Everything that benefits you should be practiced often. Taking the time to do things to help and feed your body and your mind will certainly bring you better resilience.

As Nelson Mandala eloquently summed it up, “Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.”

Why Self-Confidence Matters

Why Self-Confidence Matters

It often seems that confidence is elusive, like a smoky mirage. Sometimes, it feels magical and wonderful; other times it can be frustrating.

But I’ll let you in on a little secret: you can build up your self-confidence without having to resort to any crystal. ‘How?’ you ask.

It’s simple.

Start by recognizing that confidence is a skill you can learn. You set a goal and take small steps each day to work towards it.

Keep reading to find out more about self-confidence and why it matters.

What Is Self-Confidence?

Self-confidence isn’t tangible. You can’t touch it and say, “This is confidence.”

It’s something we get a feeling for when we, or others, have it.

Likewise, we can recognize when someone lacks it. Even when they try to attempt to compensate for it, we sense it and feel bad for them.

The good news is that self-confidence is a soft skill, which means you can learn it and apply it to your daily life. It’s not fixed, like your height for example. It’s mainly based on your mindset and the actions you do to follow through.

You can boost your confidence and self-esteem by trusting your abilities. Seeing yourself succeed in your mind is the first step in making better decisions. Then, when your decisions make your life better, your confidence gets a nice little boost. And round and round it goes.

Bear in mind that confidence is infectious. Even though we can’t see it, we still sense other people’s confidence levels in the way they behave and speak.

When someone is confident, they exude excitement and energy. You’re motivated to work hard and feel that same energy.

The downside is it goes both ways. When one person lacks confidence, it can deflate everyone around them. They just get the sense that there’s no point in trying.

Why Does Self-Confidence Matter?

There are different reasons why being confident can improve your life. Below, you’ll find a few examples of how it can make you a happier, more fulfilled individual.

Allows You to Take Positive Risks

We all need confidence to bring balance and a sense of direction in our lives. Making a conscious decision to develop your confidence will allow you to take positive risks. It gets you out of your comfort zone and puts you on the path to success.

The trick is understanding your own strength. You have to believe that you can master whatever skill you’re striving towards. Yes, it’ll be weird and difficult in the beginning. Yes, you’ll make mistakes along the way. So what?

That’s what life is about. This is what boosts your self-esteem and makes you better at everything you do.

Empowers You to Embrace Your Failures

We all make mistakes. We all fail and meet obstacles in our lives.

The key is to understand that failures are a necessary part of progress. Read that again and really take it in.

Often, we feel that when we fail, it’s the end of the journey. But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

To fully embrace your failures, you have to think of them as detours. When you’re forced to change lanes or take a detour that doesn’t mean the entire journey is over. It just means you’re taking a different path, but you’ll get there eventually.

Now, why do some people succeed after failing and others don’t? Those who manage to learn from their mistakes. They go over what went wrong and find a way to fix it.

In other words, they use their failures to their advantage. They use them to prop them up and give them the push they need to keep going on their path.

Let’s take a second to think about Thomas Edison and Michael Jordan. What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of these two names? Success? Fame? Glory? All of the above?

How about failure? You’re probably saying to yourself, ‘These are two of the most prominent members of society. They haven’t failed.’

Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but they have—many times, in fact. Yet, they’re smart enough to use their failures as stepping stones to aim higher and work harder. Imagine our much our lives would have been impacted if these two men had given up every time they failed!

One of Edison’s quotes about refining the light bulb is, “I haven’t failed. I’ve found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

Enables You To Trust Yourself

Many times, we can be our own worst enemies. We critique every move, every word, and every thought over and over again.

In moderation, it can be a great incentive to do better. Although, this only works if we treat ourselves with the same kindness and empathy, we show others. Sadly, it doesn’t happen very often.

The best way to break out of that negative self-talk is to have faith in yourself. Have faith in your decisions. Even if you made mistakes in the past, that doesn’t necessitate future failures.

Own up to your bad decision, embrace it, and move on. That’s now part of your DNA; it’s helping shape a stronger, more resilient person.

Imagine it being part of your arsenal or a superpower. Now, you’ve turned your mistake into something that can make you more resilient and less anxious.

A Final Note

Self-confidence is an integral part of who you are. Understanding why it matters can mean the difference being happy and being miserable.

Having that self-assurance can help boost your relationships and career. You’ll also be able to inspire others to become happier, more fulfilled individuals.

True and False Manliness

 

True and False Manliness

By: James Freeman Clarke, 1886

 

MANLINESS means perfect manhood, as womanliness implies perfect womanhood. Manliness is the character of a man as he ought to be, as he was meant to be. It expresses the qualities which go to make a perfect man, — truth, courage, conscience, freedom, energy, self-possession, self-control. But it does not exclude gentleness, tenderness, compassion, modesty. A man is not less manly, but more so, because he is gentle. In fact, our word ” gentleman ” shows that a typical man must also be a gentle man.

By manly qualities the world is carried forward. The manly spirit shows itself in enterprise, the love of meeting difficulties and overcoming them, — the resolution which will not yield, which patiently perseveres, and does not admit the possibility of defeat. It enjoys hard toil, rejoices in stern labor, is ready to make sacrifices, to suffer and bear disaster patiently. It is generous, giving itself to a good cause not its own ; it is public-spirited, devoting itself to the general good with no expectation of reward. It is ready to defend unpopular truth, to stand by those who are wronged, to uphold the weak. Having resolved, it does not go back, but holds on, through good report and evil, sure that the right must win at last. And so it causes truth to prevail, and keeps up the standard of a noble purpose in the world.

But as most good things have their counterfeits, so there is false manliness which imitates these great qualities, though at heart it is without them. Instead of strength of will, it is only willful; in place of courage, it has audacity. True manliness does what it believes right; false manliness, does what it chooses to do. Freedom, to one, means following his own convictions of truth; to the other it means thinking as he pleases, and doing as he likes. The one is reverent, the other rude; one is courteous, the other overbearing ; one is brave, the other foolhardy; one is modest, the other self-asserting. False manliness is cynical, contemptuous, and tyrannical to inferiors. The true man has respect for all men, is tender to the sufferer, is modest and kind. The good type uses its strength to maintain good customs, to improve the social condition, to defend order. The other imagines it to be manly to defy law, to be independent of the opinions of the wise, to sneer at moral obligation, to consider itself superior to the established principles of mankind.

A false notion of manliness leads boys astray.

All boys wish to be manly; but they often try to become so by copying the vices of men rather than their virtues. They see men drinking, smoking, swearing; so these poor little fellows sedulously imitate such bad habits, thinking they are making themselves more like men. They mistake rudeness for strength, disrespect to parents for independence. They read wretched stories about boy brigands and boy detectives, and fancy themselves heroes when they break the laws, and become troublesome and mischievous. Out of such false influences the criminal classes are recruited. Many a little boy who only wishes to be manly, becomes corrupted and debased by the bad examples around him and the bad literature which he reads. The cure for this is to give him good books that show him truly noble examples from life and history, and make him understand how infinitely above this mock-manliness is the true courage which ennobles human nature.

In a recent awful disaster, amid the blackness and darkness and tempest, the implacable sea and the pitiless storm, — when men’s hearts were failing them from terror, and women and children had no support but faith in a Divine Providence and a coming immortality, — the dreadful scene was illuminated by the courage and manly devotion of those who risked their own lives to save the lives of others. Such heroism is like a sunbeam breaking through the tempest. It shows us the real worth there is in man.

No matter how selfish mankind may seem, whenever hours like these come, which try men’s souls, they show that the age of chivalry has not gone; that though

” The knights are dust, and their good swords rust,”

there are as high-hearted heroes now as ever. Firemen rush into a flaming house to save women and children. Sailors take their lives in their hands to rescue their fellow-men from a wreck. They save them at this great risk, not because they are friends or relatives, but because they are fellow-men.

Courage is an element of manliness. It is more than readiness to encounter danger and death, for we are not often called to meet such perils. It is every-day courage which is most needed,—that which shrinks from no duty because it is difficult; which makes one ready to say what he believes, when his opinions are unpopular; which does not allow him to postpone a duty, but makes him ready to encounter it at once; a courage which is not afraid of ridicule when one believes himself right; which is not the slave of custom, the fool of fashion. Such courage as this, in man or woman or child, is true manliness. It is infinitely becoming in all persons. It does not seek display, it is often the courage of silence no less than speech; it is modest courage, unpretending though resolute. It holds fast to its convictions and principles, whether men hear or whether they forbear.

Truthfulness is another element of true manliness.

Lies usually come from cowardice, because men are afraid of standing by their flag, because they shrink from opposition, or because they are conscious of something wrong which they cannot defend, and so conceal. Secret faults, secret purposes, habits of conduct of which we are ashamed, lead to falsehood, and falsehood is cowardice. And thus the sinner is almost necessarily a coward. He shrinks from the light; he hides himself in darkness. Therefore if we wish to be manly, we must not do anything of which we are ashamed. He who lives by firm principles of truth and right, who deceives no one, injures no one, who therefore has nothing to hide, he alone is manly. The bad man may be audacious, but he has no true courage. His manliness is only a pretence, an empty shell, a bold demeanor, with no real firmness behind it.

True manliness is humane. It says, “We who are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak.” Its work is to protect those who cannot defend themselves; to stand between the tyrant and the slave, the oppressor and his victim. It is identical in all times with the spirit of chivalry which led the good knights to wander in search of robbers, giants, and tyrannical lords, those who oppressed the poor and robbed helpless women and orphans of their rights. There are no tyrant barons now, but the spirit of tyranny and cruelty is still to be found. The good knight to-day is he who provides help for the blind, the deaf and dumb,the insane; who defends animals from being cruelly treated, rescues little children from bad usage, and seeks to give working men and women their rights. He protects all these sufferers from that false manliness which is brutal and tyrannical to the weak, abusing its power over women and children and domestic animals. The true knights to-day are those who organize and carry on the societies to prevent cruelty, or to enforce the laws against those who for a little gain make men drunkards. The giants and dragons to-day are those cruelties and brutalities which use their power to ill-treat those who are at their mercy.

Attacking The Ankle

If you have ever twisted your ankle I don’t have to tell you how much pain that causes and how long the recovery takes. I remember having a bad sprain years ago and it was very painful. I was on crutches for about four weeks before I could walk with any pressure on my ankle. The angle is a complex joint of ligaments and bone. When it is manipulated in the opposite direction it was intended to work you will cause pain and injury.

I had a Martial Arts student training for a cage match years ago that had a bad ankle injury. Some Special Forces guys wanted to train so I mixed them with him for some great training for us all. We trained for a few weeks and then my student and a SF guy matched up. Went for a two minute round and they both did well. The second round though not so good. The SF guy had my student in a cinched ankle lock and was putting the pressure on it. I told my student he should just tap out, but he would not. Then I heard it Snap and it was loud. That tap out would have saved him a trip to the ER and a world of pain.

Conor McGregor a UFC Champion suffered a major ankle injury in UFC Fight 264 and had to be carried out on a stretcher with surgery to soon follow. Seems he stepped back on it and it gave away and crumbled. McGregor said he already had injured it and that weight shift finished it off.

Attacking the ankle is very tricky without some practice. The only way I would attempt to injure the ankle would be with a powerful stomp. But, if done incorrectly could damage your own ankle. So without training I would us this as a last attempt to cause injury. But, it can cause a debilitating injury to any attacker as all the primary targets that we have talked about will.

Mental Toughness

Mental Toughnes

   Think you’re tough? Think you’ve got what it takes to be a street warrior? While you may the physical strength and skills to match, mental toughness can often be something that eludes many individuals.

Mental toughness is having the natural or developed psychological edge that enables you to:

1) Generally, cope better than your opponents with the many demands (competition, training, and lifestyle) that sport places on a performer; and,

2) Specifically, be more consistent and better than your opponents in remaining determined, focused, confident, and in control under pressure.

            Can you take insults without having to throw them back? Can you accept being shoved in the back without needing to turn around and pummel the guy who did it? Can you stand by and watch someone else save the day, steal the glory, or rescue the girl?

            Mental toughness is one of the most difficult psychological aspects to develop in any type of warfare, and being mentally tough doesn’t guarantee that things won’t get to you once in a while. You still are human and your emotions are what keep you from becoming an unfeeling machine.

            There are going to be losses. That is a guarantee. It might not happen today, or tomorrow, but eventually you’re going to experience loss. Everyone loses at something at one time or another. How you respond to those losses is what defines your mental toughness.


Primary Strike Points

Self-Defense is very dangerous and takes on so much responsibility. Once you have crossed over the line of self-defense because you have no other choice, you can cause long term damage. This illustration shows you the primary targets to attack and to cause injury and major pain for the quickest reaction to stop the attack fast.

Remember get some training on how to attack these targets effectively.

Three ways to kill a man

Our lives are full of old antiquated beliefs that are not serving us in our own best interest. We have witnessed this over and over through history.

The world is not flat, the earth does rotate, muscle does not turn to fat and the list goes on and on.

I bring this up because some time ago I was invited to give a lecture to a small group on the subject of women’s self-defense. I jumped at the chance to do so, because self-defense is a subject that I have a great passion about sharing with others.

The lecture/workshop went very well and I got some very positive feedback from all the people there.

When I do these lectures/workshops I always have a person ask about or tell me a secret they know about in the martial arts. It never fails…and I always know what they are going to tell me.

This night was no different from the rest. A small older lady walked over to me and said, “I know 3 ways to kill a man.” I said, you do? I knew what she had on her mind, but I just had to ask. Tell me….what is one of those ways? She told me that she had went through some training years ago and the number one way to kill a man is by hitting him square in the face and driving the bone of his nose through his brain. She even demonstrated it for me.

I knew it! I knew she was going to say that….it never ever fails!

That is an old Hollywood bit from an old, old movie. It is physically impossible to do that. Your nose has no bone to speak of and think about how far away your brain is from your nose.

Now some dumbass trained her to believe that and probably took her money too. You see it all the time with ads on social media. Like, “Learn Navy Seal Fight Secrets” “Even an 80 year old woman can handle the most seasoned Martial Artist”

Until she spoke to me she was walking around thinking she could kill a man and could use that if she needed to. Now a good shot to the nose is a great shot and may give her time to retreat and remove herself but will not kill a man.

There are no “Navy Seal Secrets” may be some technique or principle the average person has never seen, but it is definitely no secret I promise.

These dudes don’t care about the truth or the well being of people only separating you from your money. Not to say a great teacher, coach or instructor shouldn’t make money for the knowledge they share but, at very least know who you are learning from and get some references and ask questions first.

You Got To Move

Ed Parker, the Father of American Kenpo Karate once said, “He who hesitates, meditates in a horizontal position.” You must move!

The same is true in your personal life too. Most people talk a good game about all the dreams and plans they intend but never go into action. These are the very people that will point out your failures and mistakes. They never worry about failure because they never attempt to do much in life.

Have Gun Never Shoot

I know people that own a firearm but, never ever shoot it. You have many that buy a firearm only to hide it away in a drawer or safe. They “FEEL” safe just knowing they have it close by. It may make you feel safe, but it is almost useless when you need it when you have never used it.

I know people that own a firearm and couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn at 40 ft. And that is relaxed and not under pressure like it would be in a life or death situation. When you find yourself in that situation it’s too late to figure out how to shoot. When you get the adrenalin dump and you lose all your fine motor skills the time for learning is over.

You’ll also hear guys say, “I don’t need to learn self-defense, I have a Glock.”

Well my questions are.

  1. Do you have it on you at all times?

2. How quick can you produce it?

3. What if you dropped it?

4. What if you are dealing with 2 bad guys one in the front and one behind?

5. **How Many rounds have you fired through it?

6. **With accuracy?

7. Most important ~ Are you prepared to use it with all the after effects that are to follow.

The Sucker Punch

The Sucker Punch!!

Ever seen a person get sucker punched? Have you ever been sucker punched?

A sucker punch is one of the easiest things to avoid if you know what you’re looking at. A sucker punch will come out of the blue in an instant. Always expect the unexpected.

99.9 % of the time a sucker punch will come at you just when you think the confrontation is at its end. That is why it is called a sucker punch. When the aggressor starts to turn away and you just stand there, that is the moment they turn quickly and hammer you on the head and ring your bell. You then are the sucker!

Self-defense is all about timing, distance and speed. Those three things are a lethal combination when backed by the ability to think under stress.

So just for this example we’ll talk about distance. When you have talked your way out of a situation and the aggressor starts to turn and you hope walk away, you should start to walk back a few steps and fortify yourself just in case they go for the sucker punch.

In their mind they have already measured you up and know the distance to make that sucker punch work. But, as you walk back a few steps while keeping your eyes focused on them, they will get a surprise as they turn and see that their mind has mislead them with the distance they thought they had.

Now…you have one more chance to talk this person into leaving you alone or it may be the time to engage.

 Be ready! Be Safe!

Lynn Lane

www.covertstreetwarrior.com

When To Think Like A Criminal

Sometimes it is good to think like a criminal and understand their way of thinking only to give you an edge in the future. A great habit to get into is to think of different scenarios each day that would give you the opportunity to think like a criminal. The next time you’re pumping gas, at the ATM, in line at the convenient store. If you were the criminal what area would you be in to start your attack? What would you use for cover, what door would you enter from or exit. Think of everything example you can. After you do this several times you’ll begin to do it as a habit without forcing the thought and it will give you a great edge and a step ahead and we all know that speed, distance and timing is monumental.

The other time to become criminal like is when the act of violence has been thrust in your direction and against you. You become one of two people, the victim or the criminal. When you attack violence with violence and it is justified and you know how to destroy the human body quickly you are no longer the victim. You must know that violence is always the last response. Evade, Avoid and try to talk your way out of the situation. But, once you flip that switch and cross that line that is the time to explode with surprise, aggression and speed. Train yourself in a martial art that fits you or at least learn 10 ways to deliver pain quickly and practice your skills.

Protecting The Castle – Inside

Hardening your house is the first line of
defense against criminals. But what do you do
once criminals are already inside? The most
important thing to do is to have a plan for
every family member so that they will know
what to do if an alarm goes off at 3 o’clock
in the morning, or if you hear the proverbial
bump in the night. You should periodically run
drills with the entire family to be sure they
understand the plan.

Hopefully, you will never have to use your weapon to shoot an intruder in your home.
Hardening the shell of your house and taking other measures to convince a would-be
thief to move on down the block are all preferable options, but sometimes the worst case
scenario does happen.

Now is the time to prepare and Stand Ready and not when it happens.

Be The Man

A man is shaped by the men he respects!

Mature, calm, and collected

Self-confident and aware of who he is

A Protector

A Provider

Not afraid to show vulnerability

Shows assertiveness

Be bold; trust yourself

Balance your life

Commit to your word

Seek knowledge

Has a vision to lead

A great sense of humor

He has a purpose

Amor Fati

Amor fati is a Latin phrase that may be translated as “love of fate” or “love of one’s fate”. It is used to describe an attitude in which one sees everything that happens in one’s life, including suffering and loss, as good or, at the very least, necessary.

The Stoics were not only familiar with this attitude but they embraced it. … It is why amor fati is the Stoic mindset that you take on for making the best out of anything that happens: Treating each and every moment—no matter how challenging—as something to be embraced, not avoided.

Amor Fati teaches us to put our energy and effort into what will be most impactful in our lives so that we don’t waste our time worrying about things that we don’t have the power to change. When faced with adversity, the goal isn’t to just passively accept it nor is it to simply think positively about it.

Sheepdog

“If you want to be a sheep, then you can be a sheep and that is okay, but you must understand the price you pay. When the wolf comes, you and your loved ones are going to die if there is not a sheepdog there to protect you. If you want to be a wolf, you can be one, but the sheepdogs are going to hunt you down and you will never have rest, safety, trust or love. But if you want to be a sheepdog and walk the warrior’s path, then you must make a conscious and moral decision every day to dedicate, equip and prepare yourself to thrive in that toxic, corrosive moment when the wolf comes knocking at the door.” – Lt. Col. David Grossman

Covert Street Warrior – Social Unrest Handbook – Get A Copy –>Here<–

Down Time

Over the years I’ve read some amazing books by some very amazing people. I look at my life at times and take notice of the habits I’ve picked up because of the positive influence they had on me.

I implemented this habit years ago when I was young but I didn’t know the power of it until I read Brian Tracy and later John Maxwell.

The habit is to find some down time to think. I’ve always done this from the time I was a kid. But the thinking wasn’t organized the way it is today.

Your place to think never has to be ordinary.

Some successful people I know of get comfortable in a dark room and just think and wait for an answer to a question they are thinking about.

You can also find other very successful people that do their best thinking in a small crowd of people like a coffee shop or restaurant. J. K. Rowling, author of the “Harry Potter” books did some of her best work in a cafe’ and coffee shop. Some people need to have that little distraction to stimulate the thinking process.

It may not be as important where your thinking place is as long as you get to really think.

Thanks.

Lynn Lane

Make This Moment Count.

Purpose-Power

The majority of people never live a life of purpose because it takes hard work and discipline. Most people just settle for what comes along. They live the life of quiet desperation. They talk about what they should do and dream big dreams, but never go forward. A life without action is a life without purpose. Success has been studied and researched for years. We have more information on success today than ever before and one outstanding similarity is that the winners in life all have a major definite purpose. You see, it’s your purpose that keeps you in a forward motion.

Your purpose gives you momentum. We need to know that we are growing and making a contribution. Each time you reach a goal your self-esteem will grow and then you’ll build on that accomplishment, like an avalanche it will grow as it pushes forward. That’s why winners have goals and a major purpose for their life.
Tony Robbins, life coach and inspirational speaker on leading a successful life, says, “People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals – that is, goals that do not inspire them.” Some people have a goal to get up and go to work.

The Beginner – The Expert

“In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few”
― Shunryu Suzuk

Always remain the student. A cup can never receive when it is full…empty the cup for new knowledge. The expert should always be ready to learn new possibilities. That is what it means to be a Master of oneself.

Values, Virtues and Strengths

Greek word commonly translated as happiness or welfare. In Aristotle’s works, eudaimonia was (based on older Greek tradition) used as the term for the highest human good, and so it is the aim of practical philosophy, including ethics and political philosophy, to consider (and also experience) what it really is, and how it can be achieved.

Seven groupings of values and strengths that have been universally loved across cultures, religions and history:

•             Integrity

•             Generosity

•             Courage

•             Humility

•             Compassion

•             Loyalty

•             Perseverance

Identify your strengths and virtues. At what do you shine? A literature review of all major religions and philosophies of the last 3,000 years reveals the same seven major categories of 24 virtues (from Seligman, Authentic Happiness, 2002):

I. Wisdom and Knowledge                                                         

  1. Curiosity/Interest in the World
  2. Love of Learning
  3. Judgment/Critical Thinking/Open-Mindedness
  4. Ingenuity/Originality/Practical Intelligence/Street Smarts
  5. Social Intelligence/Personal Intelligence/Emotional Intelligence
  6. Perspective

II. Justice

  • Citizenship/Duty/Teamwork/Loyalty
  •  Fairness and Equity
  •  Leadership

III. Courage

  1.  Valor and Bravery
  2.  Perseverance/Industry/Diligence
  3.  Integrity/Genuineness/Honesty

IV. Temperance

  1.  Self-Control
  2.  Prudence/Discretion/Caution
  3.  Humility and Modesty

VI. Love and Humanity

  1.  Kindness and Generosity
  2.  Loving and Allowing Oneself to Be Loved

VII. Spirituality and Transcendence

  1.  Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence
  2.  Gratitude
  3.  Hope/Optimism/Future-Mindedness
  4.  Spirituality/Sense of Purpose/Faith/Religiousness
  5.  Forgiveness and Mercy
  6.  Playfulness and Humor
  7.  Zest/Passion/Enthusiasm

Once you identify what truly matters to you, look at how you express these strengths and virtues in your daily life. Prioritize your values, distinguishing the top three to five that are most important to you today

The psychologist C. D. Ryff highlighted the distinction between eudaimonia wellbeing, which she identified as psychological well-being and pleasure. Building on Aristotelian ideals of belonging and benefiting others, flourishing, thriving and exercising excellence, she conceptualized eudaimonia as a six-factor structure :

1. Autonomy

2. Personal growth

3. Self-acceptance

4. Purpose in life

5. Environmental mastery

6. Positive relations with others.

Three paths to happy lives

Three paths to happy lives.

The core thesis in Authentic Happiness  by Martin E. P. Seligman 2002 is that there are three very different routes to happiness. First the Pleasant Life, consisting in having as many pleasures as possible and having the skills to amplify the pleasures. This is, of course, the only true kind of happiness on the Hollywood view. Second, the Good Life, which consists in knowing what your signature strengths are, and then recrafting your work, love, friendship, leisure and parenting to use those strengths to have more flow in life. Third, the Meaningful Life, which consists of using your signature strengths in the service of something that you believe is larger than you are.

Conquering Your Demons For Success.

Knowing that we need to work on our strengths is a very important part of success but, do you know where that strength originates?

We are not created with all the strengths for success. We are conditioned by challenges we have in our life and we inherited some attitudes from our family and friends.

Here is the martial arts metaphor: In the movie Dragon : The Bruce Lee Story, Bruce’s Sifu (Teacher) Nip Man told Bruce that he must conquer his demons or he would pass them on down to his children.

You will gain strength through facing your own demons. Your demons are the fears we have that we must face and with the warrior attitude defeat, conquer then move above and beyond with renewed strength and confidence.

I remember when I was in school if I had to stand up and give an oral report or take a failing grade I would take the bad grade.

 I faced that Demon later in my life and joined Toastmasters International and started to love being in front of a group of people and sharing the things that can inspire and motivate them to move toward their own success.

Think about of all the areas in your life that you gain strength from. Think about the challenges that made you stronger. What are some of the Demons you had to face?

Better question……What are some of the Demons you need to face, defeat, conquer and move beyond today?

Think about the challenges you have accepted that at the start you didn’t think you could conquer, but as you faced them you grew from it and now you are above and beyond it.

Why should we know where we gain strength from? Because, once you know this you can pay more attention to that area of your life and focus on building that strength.

When you find people, places and things that inspire or motivate you to go for your greatness and to work toward dreams that are hoped for….. you gather strength.

Conquering Your Demons For Success.

Knowing that we need to work on our strengths is a very important part of success but, do you know where that strength originates?

We are not created with all the strengths for success. We are conditioned by challenges we have in our life and we inherited some attitudes from our family and friends.

Here is the martial arts metaphor: In the movie Dragon : The Bruce Lee Story, Bruce’s Sifu (Teacher) Nip Man told Bruce that he must conquer his demons or he would pass them on down to his children.

You will gain strength through facing your own demons. Your demons are the fears we have that we must face and with the warrior attitude defeat, conquer then move above and beyond with renewed strength and confidence.

I remember when I was in school if I had to stand up and give an oral report or take a failing grade I would take the bad grade.

 I faced that Demon later in my life and joined Toastmasters International and started to love being in front of a group of people and sharing the things that can inspire and motivate them to move toward their own success.

Think about of all the areas in your life that you gain strength from. Think about the challenges that made you stronger. What are some of the Demons you had to face?

Better question……What are some of the Demons you need to face, defeat, conquer and move beyond today?

Think about the challenges you have accepted that at the start you didn’t think you could conquer, but as you faced them you grew from it and now you are above and beyond it.

Why should we know where we gain strength from? Because, once you know this you can pay more attention to that area of your life and focus on building that strength.

When you find people, places and things that inspire or motivate you to go for your greatness and to work toward dreams that are hoped for….. you gather strength.

Navy SEAL Inspired Baseline Workout

Navy SEAL Inspired Baseline Workout

by Jason Earls

Navy SEALS are the most elite branch of American Special Forces, and most military experts consider their training to be the most difficult to endure in the entire world. A SEAL candidate (“SEAL” stands for Sea, Air, and Land, all elements in which a Navy SEAL operates) must survive BUD/S training, which stands for “Basic Underwater Demolition / SEAL” training. BUD/S lasts seven long grueling months and you may be surprised to learn that during that time there are no actual weights or weight-lifting involved. The majority of BUD/S training involves only body weight exercises (calisthenics) such as: pullups, pushups, situps, dips, running, air squats, lunges, etc., (although logs and boats are used regularly, and the boats are usually loaded down with sand, or an instructor, water, or all three). Very few individuals actually complete SEAL training since the Naval Special Warfare Command is looking for a select group of elite men who are highly-motivated and would rather die than quit. Due to the rigorous physical conditioning, the men who pass SEAL training are some of the most physically fit specimens on the planet. Hence, wouldn’t it make sense that if you wanted to get in shape, you could simply adopt some of the training patterns used at BUD/S, perhaps even pretend that you will soon attempt Navy SEAL training yourself, and by default wouldn’t you get in the best shape of your life? Of course you would, so let’s get started.

(Note: the author of this article is NOT a Navy SEAL and has never served in any branch of the military.)

To even enter BUD/S training, a candidate must be in extremely good physical shape just to walk in the door. After studying various Navy SEAL documentaries, SEAL web sites with workout programs listed, plus youtube videos made by legitimate SEALs, the following baseline was discovered which provides a “ground” level of fitness that a person should possess if they want to do well at BUD/S. Here is the baseline:

  1. 100 excellent pushups.
  2. 15 good dead-hang pullups.
  3. 100 strict situps.
  4. A four-mile run completed in under 30 minutes.

The four “benchmarks” given above are what one Navy SEAL listed as his baseline level of fitness before entering BUD/S training, and he said that he did extremely well and consistently remained in the top performance percentages of his entire class, and eventually passed to have a 20-year career in the Navy SEAL teams.

So if we take these four basic exercises: running, pushups, pullups, and situps, and construct workouts around them, always keeping in mind the baseline level of fitness above, surely we would get close to fulfilling our maximum potential for physical fitness. Or course it will take loads of will-power and self-motivation to continue training day after day toward this goal, but it’s already assumed you are a highly-motivated, fire-breathing, combat-focused individual since you are reading this article in the first place.

Here is an example of what might be considered an “intermediate” level workout constructed around our four basic exercises:

One circuit:

  1. Run a half mile without stopping.
  2. One set of 20-30 pushups.
  3. One set of 3-8 pullups.
  4. One set of 30-40 situps.

Repeat this circuit 2 to 5 times.

Note that we are doing pullups, which are performed with your palms facing away from your body, not chin-ups in which your palms are facing toward your body. (Chin-ups are easier than pullups and thus chin-ups are never performed at BUD/S!)

Many different workouts can be constructed around the four basic exercises given above, limited only by your imagination. But you should always try to keep the original Navy SEAL baseline in mind and aim for those numbers. Giving yourself a “PT test” once every month or two is also a good idea, just to see how you are progressing. As soon as you attain the amount of reps and time given in the original baseline (or even get pretty close), it’s guaranteed you will be in extremely good physical condition!

Another primary thing most Navy Seals agree on is that you will have to be an excellent runner to do well in BUD/S training. Navy SEAL candidates literally run everywhere they go, covering numerous miles per day, which is great thing to keep in mind if you are trying to get in good shape, since the more running you do the less body fat you will have.

Once you have established a good level of fitness by training with the four basic exercises for, say, 2 to 5 months, you could try an advanced workout such as: “cumulative total in one day of all exercises”:

  1. One maximum set of pullups.
  2. One maximum set of pushups.
  3. One maximum set of situps.
  4. A maximum effort run for mileage.

Then you would write down your reps and mileage after this circuit, then spend the rest of the day (working on-and-off with as much, or as little, rest between circuits as you wanted), repeating the circuit again and again and recording your results, attempting to accumulate as many reps in each exercise, plus as many miles as possible. After your last circuit of the day you would total up and record whatever you were able to accomplish. Keep in mind that a Navy SEAL would be able to do roughly: 150 pullups, 400 pushups, 400 situps, and run 15 miles (plus swim about 6 miles) all in the course of one day.

Hooyah and good luck reaching your fitness goals!

    -end-

Surviving a Riot: Seven Tips for Reducing Your Risk

One summer day in London, England, a man stepped out of his apartment–and into a riot.

The man was Mansoor Siddique, a native Londoner who ran an online business and didn’t pay much attention to news. His two year old son was acting up at home, so he decided they both needed some fresh air and a walk in the nearest business district. But this was August 8, 2011, at the height of some of the worst rioting London has seen in decades. As Siddique stepped onto the street, he saw rioters looting a nearby shop. He described the experience this way [link to http://www.mansoorsiddique.com/life/london-riots-and-tottenham-shooting/]: “I almost [felt] like I went to sleep and woke up in a zombie flick!”

In moments, he and his son became targets of the looters: a few approached, expressing interest in Siddique’s watch. When these would-be muggers got distracted, however, Siddique picked up his son and ran. He eventually sheltered behind a dumpster, his son asking all the while why his father wouldn’t let him walk.

What makes a riot? Anger or fear, plus a lot of people gathered together in a small area. As global economic challenges mount, and society finds it more and more difficult to cope with them, riots–and especially riots in big cities–are likely to become more frequent. In 2007-8, a spike in food prices led to riots in Bangladesh, Egypt, and many other countries. In 2011, riots over economic policy rocked Athens, the capital of Greece. And as political differences provoke mass demonstrations like Occupy Wall Street, the more likely open–and violent–confrontations with law enforcement become, even in the United States.

So what would you do if you stepped out of your home, or into the streets of a city you were visiting, and found yourself in the middle of a riot? Here’s a short guide to surviving a riot and the immediate aftermath.

1. Be aware. The man who stepped out into the London riots lived there, and he wasn’t aware of what was going on. You can’t always predict a riot in advance. But the best way to survive a riot is to avoid it. Keep out of places where you know there’s going to be a political demonstration. Don’t travel to countries experiencing civil unrest. If you find yourself in the middle of some sort of trouble, leave the scene–especially if you’re starting to see any low-level confrontations with the authorities.

2. Be prepared. If you can’t avoid a danger zone, be ready for anything. If you’re visiting a foreign country, dress like a local (but be careful not to dress like a local policeman or dissident-type). If you live or work in an area where a riot seems possible, prepare a bag of supplies–food, water, clothing, toiletries–so that you can stay put for as long as a few days. If the situation is tense, and you get the sense that things may boil over soon, wear clothes that protect you from tear gas and other crowd-control weapons whenever you go out.

3. Take stock. Riots evolve, and you should tailor you approach to where you are in relation to what’s going on–and to the point during the riot you’ve arrived on the scene. Think of a riot like a battle: there’s a moving line of conflict where rioters confront the police, or engage in looting and destruction. There’s also generally an area behind the lines, where there’s far less activity, and far more opportunities for you to find safety. Even if the riots go on for days, you’re likely to be “behind the lines” for most of that time.

4. If you’re in the front lines, get out. Let’s say you’re leaving a sporting event or a concert, and the crowd’s getting rowdy. So–get out of the crowd. Make your way to the sides and look for an escape route–a crossroads, a mall, anything that offers an exit. Until you find one, keep a barrier between you and the mob, something like a wall or even a set of steps or a row of columns. If there’s a police line, don’t regard that as a way out. The police may regard your approach as a threat and take action. Finally, as you move to the sides be sure to go with the flow. Moving against the crowd invites conflict and raises the risk you’ll stumble and possibly get trampled.

5. If you’re in a car on the front lines, you can try driving through the crowd, as slowly and as courteously as possible. If the crowd gets rowdy or decides to regard you as a provocation or a threat, be prepared to abandon your vehicle. If you can see violence through your windshield, that’s also a sign to get out of the car. Your life is much more important than your property.

6. Don’t be a hero. This applies whether you’re in the front lines or behind them. Jumping in to stop a fight or preach at looters just makes you a target to a mob already prone to violence. And if the police do show up, they may not be able to tell you’re one of the good guys–making you a potential target for both sides.

7. Get inside. If you’re behind the lines, this is your best option. Our London businessman, Mansoor Siddique, fled with his son to a friend’s house after the immediate danger had passed. After waiting a while, he returned home. Like him, find somewhere safe to shelter. Again, if you live or work in an area where a riot seems possible, have a supply bag ready so you can hunker down until law enforcement regains control.

Riots are frightening things. But if you keep your head, you can make it out with a minimum of risk. And if you prepare beforehand, you’ll find avoiding risk much easier than you might think..

To Prevent Carjacking

How to Prevent Carjacking

In today’s world, carjacking is a crime that continues to pose a significant threat to drivers. This dangerous act not only leads to the theft of your vehicle but can also result in personal harm or even loss of life. However, there are steps you can take to minimize the risk of falling victim to carjacking. In this blog, we will explore various strategies and safety measures to help you prevent carjacking and protect yourself and your vehicle.

1. Stay Vigilant:

The first and most crucial step in preventing carjacking is to remain alert and vigilant. Criminals often target distracted or unaware drivers. Be mindful of your surroundings, especially in high-risk areas or when stopped at traffic lights. Avoid distractions like texting or making phone calls while driving, as they can make you an easy target.

2. Lock Your Doors:

Always keep your doors locked while driving, even in seemingly safe areas. Many carjackings occur when a criminal suddenly opens an unlocked door and threatens the driver. Locking your doors can provide an additional layer of security.

3. Use Well-Lit and Busy Areas:

When parking your vehicle, opt for well-lit and busy locations, particularly at night. Criminals prefer isolated and dark areas where they can strike unnoticed. Bright and crowded parking lots or streets deter potential carjackers.

4. Install an Anti-Theft System:

Consider installing a reliable anti-theft system in your vehicle. These systems can include alarms, immobilizers, and tracking devices, which not only protect your car from theft but can also deter would-be carjackers.

5. Be Cautious at Stoplights:

When stopping at a traffic light or a stop sign, leave enough space between your vehicle and the car in front of you. This allows you to have an escape route in case you need to drive away quickly. Keep an eye on your rearview mirror to be aware of any approaching vehicles.

6. Trust Your Instincts:

Your intuition is a powerful tool in preventing carjacking. If something doesn’t feel right or you sense a potential threat, trust your instincts. It’s better to drive away from a situation that feels unsafe rather than ignoring your gut feeling.

7. Keep Valuables Out of Sight:

Visible valuables in your car can attract the attention of criminals. Ensure that laptops, bags, and other valuable items are not visible through the windows. Use your vehicle’s trunk to store items securely.

8. Avoid Giving Rides to Strangers:

It’s essential to be cautious about giving rides to strangers, especially in unfamiliar areas. If someone appears in distress and needs assistance, offer to call for help rather than letting them into your car.

9. Be Mindful of Carjacking Techniques:

Understanding common carjacking techniques can help you avoid falling victim to them. Some tactics used by carjackers include feigning an accident, asking for directions, or pretending to be in distress. Stay cautious when approached by strangers in these situations.

10. Stay Informed:

Stay updated on local news and reports of carjackings in your area. Knowledge of recent incidents and trends can help you make informed decisions about where and when to travel.

11. Self-Defense Training:

Consider taking self-defense classes to equip yourself with skills that can help you in emergency situations. Learning how to protect yourself can provide you with valuable tools to fend off an attacker.

12. Have a Plan:

In the event of a carjacking attempt, have a plan in mind. Your safety is the top priority. If someone tries to steal your vehicle, it’s often best to comply with their demands and avoid escalating the situation. Remember, your life is more valuable than any possession.

Preventing carjacking requires a combination of awareness, preparedness, and proactive measures. By following these tips and remaining vigilant, you can significantly reduce the risk of becoming a carjacking victim. Your safety is paramount, so always prioritize it when faced with potentially dangerous situations on the road.

Stay Informed and Stand Ready!

The Positive Powerhouse

In a world full of Debbie Downers and the Poor Little Ole Me Crowd, strive for the Positive Powerhouse you were created to be.


Introducing the “Positive Powerhouse” – individuals who radiate optimism, embrace challenges, and inspire others with their unwavering positivity. These vibrant souls light up every room they enter, infusing life with energy, enthusiasm, and a can-do attitude.

They see obstacles as opportunities and setbacks as stepping stones towards growth. With a perpetual smile and an uplifting spirit, they spread infectious joy, turning mundane moments into memorable experiences. Their zest for life is contagious, sparking a chain reaction of positivity that transforms not only their own lives but also those around them.

In the face of adversity, a “Positive Powerhouse” remains undeterred, transforming setbacks into stories of triumph. They tackle challenges head-on, armed with an unshakable belief that they can overcome anything. Through their perseverance, they prove that a positive mindset can turn dreams into reality.

The “Positive Powerhouse” doesn’t merely avoid negativity; they actively cultivate positivity. They understand that every thought, action, and word carries the power to shape reality. With unwavering determination, they choose to see the silver lining, finding beauty even in the midst of chaos.

Their optimism isn’t blind; it’s a conscious choice. They acknowledge the existence of hardships but refuse to let them define their outlook. They choose to uplift, inspire, and create a ripple effect of positivity wherever they go.

In a world sometimes clouded by pessimism, the “Positive Powerhouse” stands as a beacon of hope. They remind us that each day is a canvas waiting for strokes of positivity, and each setback is a chance to rewrite the narrative. So let’s embrace their spirit, amplify their energy, and become architects of a brighter world, one positive thought at a time.

Stay positive and keep spreading good vibes!

A Dangerous Yet Self-Controlled Man

A dangerous yet self-controlled man can exude the following qualities:

  1. Intense Focus: He possesses a laser-like focus that allows him to remain calm and composed in high-pressure situations. This focus enables him to make calculated decisions and execute them with precision.
  2. Commanding Presence: He carries an aura of authority and confidence that naturally draws attention. His mere presence demands respect, and others instinctively recognize his capability and power.
  3. Controlled Strength: He possesses physical and mental strength but exercises restraint in its application. He knows when to unleash his power and when to hold it back, exhibiting self-control even in moments of potential aggression.
  4. Mysteriousness: He keeps his intentions and true capabilities veiled, leaving others intrigued and captivated. His enigmatic nature adds an element of allure and unpredictability, making him both intriguing and slightly intimidating.
  5. Unwavering Calm: Despite being aware of the dangers around him, he remains composed and unruffled. He doesn’t let emotions cloud his judgment or dictate his actions, maintaining a cool-headed demeanor even in the face of adversity.

These qualities collectively contribute to the dangerous yet self-controlled man’s captivating presence and the sense that he is a force to be reckoned with.